Once Upon a Time in Venice

"[It] wastes its lead and everything else around him (...) Slipshod from the start (...) The film limps towards its mostly unearned conclusion (...) Bruce, you’re better than this." 

"[Willis] skateboarding naked for the sake of slapstick laughs (…) A shaggy dog story (...) Rating: ★½ (out of 4)" 

"The structural model here lies somewhere between the Coens’ 'The Big Lebowski' (...) and Robert Altman’s 'The Long Goodbye' — but the film has neither the wit nor the atmosphere to pull off even its broader, bro-ier take on such territory." 

"A bunch of well-known faces look lost in 'Once Upon a Time in Venice', which is billed as an action-comedy but has little comedy and less action." 

"Bruce Willis continues the 'I don’t give a damn, write me a check' phase of his career with 'Once Upon a Time in Venice', a lame action-comedy" 

"Stylistically, 'Once Upon A Time In Venice' is mostly indistinguishable from a middling TV pilot that never made it to series (...) It ends on a completely arbitrary note" 

"A wincingly unfunny comedy (...) The smug movie is piled high with tired stereotypes (...) and half-baked action (...) Clearly large chunks of the dialogue have been improvised here" 

"'Venice' never takes itself very seriously, but it had enough going for it to attract a talented cast (...) It’s the kind of curiosity that doesn’t get made much anymore, but when it does, its weirdness is worth noting."